By Susan Granger
Special to WestportNow
Have you ever bought one of those giant tubs of hot, buttered popcorn? You know how you feel after you’ve gorged yourself? That’s how bloated I felt after nearly three hours of “Avengers: Infinity War,” a massive comic-book spectacle.
The new villain is Titan’s gigantic, galactic warlord Thanos (James Brolin). In the opening scene, Thanos decimates Asgard on his path to cosmic genocide, a task he can only accomplish by stealing six Infinity Stones. When they’re combined in a Gauntlet, Thanos will be able to control time, space and energy, along with altering the laws of physics and reality.
But Loki (Tom Hiddleston) has the blue Space stone. Doctor Strange (Benedict Cumberbatch) has the green Time stone. The Collector (Benicio Del Toro) has the red Reality stone. Vision (Paul Bettany) has the yellow Mind stone embedded in his forehead. Star-Lord (Chris Pratt) and his space-faring Guardians of the Galaxy (including scene-stealing Groot) have the purple Power stone. And then there’s the elusive, sacrifice-demanding Soul Stone.
So it’s up to 20+ Marvel superheroes to maintain order in the universe, under the leadership of Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), who has to postpone festivities with Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow), and Thor (Chris Hemsworth), who is still minus an eye and his hammer.
Toss in Wakanda’s Black Panther (Chadwick Boseman), Captain America (Chris Evans), Spider-Man (Tom Holland), Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson), Scarlet Witch (Elizabeth Olsen), War Machine (Don Cheadle), Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson), Stan Lee’s cameo, and the Incredible Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), who can’t seem to get his ‘green’ thing going.
Even so, Thanos, clutching his ‘adoptive’ daughters Gamora (Zoe Saldana) and Nebula (Karen Gillan), isn’t about to give up easily. Not surprisingly, it ends with a cliffhanger, setting up the May, 2019, sequel which is already filmed.
Working from a wisecrack-filled script by Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely (“Captain America: Civil War”), directors Joe and Anthony Russo move these crossover superheroes around like chess pieces, adding a few ‘new’ characters, the most memorable played by Peter Dinklage.
Yet what’s most amazing is how — after filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in 1996 — Marvel, led by producer Kevin Feige, now dominates the global box-office.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Avengers: Infinity War” is an overstuffed 7 — and, yes, wait for the ‘post-credit’ scene.
It’s no secret why “Super Troopers 2,” Jay Chandrasekhar’s stoner sequel was released back on April 20th. To marijuana users, that date is considered an international holiday, particularly since pot is now legal in nine states.
After “Super Troopers” became a 2001 cult hit, the five-man Colgate University sketch comedy squad known as Broken Lizard kept trying, but their “Club Dread,” “Beerfest” and “The Slammin’ Salmon” never quite hit the mark. So they launched a crowdfunding campaign, raising $4.7 million for yet another try.
This time, having lost their jobs as Vermont Highway Patrolmen, they go to work in construction. But when historians discover that Vermont’s northern border was drawn incorrectly, encompassing part of Quebec, the Governor (Lynda Carter) realizes she needs French-speaking reinforcements.
Summoned by their long-suffering boss, Capt. O’Hagan (Brian Cox), the previously disgraced guys are eager to accept this transitional job, setting up headquarters in a log-cabin.
Although the nearest town’s Mayor Guy LeFranc (Rob Lowe) is cordial, most French Canadians are not exactly welcoming. A trio of Mounties (Tyler Labine, Will Sasso, Hayes MacArthur) are particularly antagonistic. A series of pranks ensues between the lawmen, culminating in the Yanks impersonating Canucks.
Somewhere along the way, they manage to bust a mysterious local drug-and-gun smuggling ring. And there’s an absurd romantic hookup between the former rookie Rabbit (Erik Stolhanske) and cultural attaché Genevieve (Emmanuelle Chriqui). Plus an ongoing gag about Danny DeVito, who executive produced the original but, apparently, never bothered to go to see it.
Director/co-star Jay Chandrasekhar and his co-writers/co-stars Kevin Heffernan, Steve Lemme, Paul Soter and Erik Stolhanske keep the decidedly unfunny, drug-addled action rolling along, accompanied by an excessive, audibly grating rock soundtrack and far too many sexist and homophobic references.
FYI: Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong made “Up in Smoke,” the first stoner comedy. After that came “Pineapple Express,” “Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle,” Ice Cube’s “Friday,” “Neighbors” and “We’re the Millers,” among others.
On the Granger Gauge, “Super Troopers 2” is a stale, fume-filled 2. Yup, you could get a contact high just by sitting in the theater.
(Editor’s Note: Westport resident Susan Granger grew up in Hollywood, studied journalism with Pierre Salinger at Mills College, and graduated from the University of Pennsylvania with highest honors in journalism. In addition to writing for newspapers and magazines, she has been on radio/television as an anchorwoman and movie/drama critic for many years. See her reviews at www.susangranger.com.)
